Sunday, February 14, 2010

Operation Dancing Hygiene

So much of my work is highly confidential. That is why here on this blog you'll never hear about my activities during the Cold War in Afghanistan working with Ahmad Shah Massoud, trading intelligence in exchange for resources and supplies.

Yes, never will you hear about how I spent many a cold night in that rickety Chinook helicopter as it bobbed and weaved its way through the craggy cliffs of the Panjshir Valley for meetings with the Northern Alliance commander. Oh, I would never go on to tell how over the course of my time there I probably provided Massoud with well over $5,000,000 in exchange for his support and advancement of our agenda in Afghanistan.

No, you won't hear any of that here -it's classified, you see.

In much the same vein, I took a trip out to LA this past week to participate in Operation Dancing Hygiene. Now once again, for reasons of confidentiality and national security, I can not reveal my involvement. However, I can tell you that I was part of the planning of this operation targeted at winning the "hearts and minds" of the Los Angeles populous through dancing and targeted product integration.

While so much of my work lives in the shadows of clandestine operational planning, occasionally, some of my work makes news in the mainstream media (MSM) and internet -a mere footnote of history. Operation Dancing Hygiene is one such op.



Wasn't that heartwarming? Yes, well, that's all part of the plan. What's that? You've got questions? Well, sure I could tell you more...

...but then I'd have to kill you.

So instead, I'll pass on a little saying Massoud used to always recite every 14 February:

روز ولنتاین مبارک امریکا

[Farsi Translation: Happy Valentine's Day, America!]

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