Monday, May 04, 2009

A Quicky: Rainy Days & Mondays

Go ahead, push play. You deserve it. The weekend has come to a close and I can't help feeling that I was robbed.

Maybe it was because it was shitty outside this weekend. Maybe it was because I spent most of my Samedi et Dimanche with my ass securely fixed to my somewhat distressed IKEA loveseat (my loveseat, much like Virginia, is for lovers) watching John Adams for the 14th time. That doesn't matter. I still feel like I should have more weekendy time, don't you?

Of course you do. This leaves us with a few options:

  1. Straight up, don't go to work and declare a "misday" - this is much like a mistrial except no legal body other than your own body declares this to be so.
  2. Stand on your head. I don't really know what this will do, but I was told in college that it gives you energy and refocuses you. I also went to school with a bunch of touchy feely nincompoops so I wouldn't put too much stock in it.
  3. Fake a seizure. Perhaps a desperate measure, but how badly do you not want to go to work today? Do you fake-a-seizure not want to go? Only you can decide.
  4. Call into work and declare "today I'm working from home." In short, working from home means sending (3) bullshit emails to prove to your boss that you are not just sitting in front of your 52" flatscreen watching Bull Durham, which of course you will be.
Yes friends, I'm claiming Swine Flu. And that's all that needs to be said.

Are you and your family worried about swine flu? Don't. This explains it all for you.

Like this vid? Go here for more. Or don't it's your prerogative on this Monday.

No comments:


Related Posts with Thumbnails