Monday, November 03, 2008

On A Night Like This

Ya tie ti ti teee!

I'm so sorry that you had to start your Monday without my regular commentary, but I have a good excuse.

After a kick ass Halloween, the details of which are under lock and key for National Security reasons, I had a long day at the New York City Marathon.

Yes friends, Sunday morning I was up at 4:00am to make my way to the course to provide runners at Mile 18 with unsolicited Irish step dancing (pictured). It was a long day -what with all the shuffle hop step, hop, step, hop stepping, but it was a world event and I would not disappoint the race's 40,000 participants. They had trained too damn hard to let that happen. Ball change.

Consequently, when I arrived home I swaddled myself in 800 count Egyptian cotton, and settled in for a long winter's nap.

While yesterday, I couldn't close my eyes soon enough, this evening I find myself utterly unable to sleep.

When I was a kid there was one day that drew Christmas-like excitement to Garrigan kids -Cedar Point Day. If you are from Ohio, you're probably nodding your head furiously in agreement. Well stop, no one thinks your cool when you do that. For those readers not familiar with Cedar Point, it is the Roller Coaster Capital of the World, and a child's wonderland.

I remember being 10 or 12, and laying on the top tier of a bunk bed I shared with my brother, Brian, staring at the ceiling. Oh, how I could picture every magical moment: The second where the roller coaster skyline appeared like Brigadoon when we crossed the causeway, the smell of greasy corn dogs and sweaty people, and the parking lots littered with carcasses of seagulls, felled by Alka-Seltzer induced assassinations. Ah, memories...

There was this level of excitement, I thought I would never fall asleep. When I did fall finally asleep, I immediately peed the bed -much to the chagrin of my unfortunately placed brother. That's the kind of excitement / bladder control issues Cedar Point Day would illicit. Tonight, friends, on the eve of voting, I feel that same wet the bed anticipation.

Now, I don't know if it is all the amphetamines, the impending riots, or just a lil' case of pre-post-mortem depression caused by the death of the word, "maverick," but darn it all, I can't sleep. I'm too excited!!!

Never one to waste time, I've decided to use this anticipation-fueled energy to be productive. Why here's just a smattering of what I've done tonight:

  1. Taught myself how to tie a bow tie.
  2. Wrote and choreographed an evening of Judy Woodruff inspired haikus / interpretive dances.
  3. Bought a gun.
  4. Taped up my wrists and engaged in an extensive carpel tunnel stretching routine to avoid a voting lever-induced injury.
  5. Interstalked you on Facebook.
  6. Used Video Professor to take the mystery out of using the World Wide Web.
  7. Tidied up my underground bunker.
  8. Wrote blog post blaming Ohio / Florida / Pennsylvania for Obama loss.
  9. Wrote blog post celebrating Ohio / Florida / Pennsylvania for Obama win.
  10. One word: decoupage.
Yeah, so all this antsy-ness really hasn't been useful to any one. So, um, sorry about that. Anyway, don't forget to vote tomorrow. Kthxbai!


Lisa said...

Just want to give a shout out to the excitement surrounding Cedar Point Day...and also point out that until approximately age 16 Patrick would cry in fear when my parents made him ride any ride outside of kiddy land. And also when he saw clowns.

But anyway, yay election day-GO OBAMA!

Sharon said...

Yay, Cedar Point. Yay, Obama, Boo, Clowns.


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