Sunday, November 05, 2006

AXIOMS

As I have shared in past postings, I have opinions about just about everything. Throughout my opining I have come up with a few constants. A few axioms, if you will:



Axiom 1 - THE HOT GIRL COMPLEX
The axiom of the hot girl complex contends that any [hot] girl who is aware of her own hotness becomes, through this self-awareness, "not hot" or "repellent."

This axiom was initially created during my first trip out to LA. Despite these seemingly superficial beginnings, the hot girl complex has gone on to become a metaphor for those expressing this over-confidence in intellect, talent or piousness.

Axiom 2 - THE LAW OF HUMOR and AGING
This law dictates that if you do everything with a certain degree of mirth, it will keep you young.

In my current marketing position, I come in contact with a lot of very serious people. Most of whom are only in their late twenties or early thirties. A majority of these twenty and thirty-somethings are so tense and boring that you would guess them to be ten years senior their actual age. Then there are others that I have met aged in their 50s and beyond, who are so vivacious and full of joie de vie, that you would guess them to be that same ten years shy of their birthday. Also, I think it is scientific, and stuff....


Axiom 3 - THE RULE OF THE BLUETOOTH
The axiom of the rule of the Bluetooth states that if you have a Bluetooth headset for your cell phone and you keep said headset on your ear in the off chance you MIGHT get a call, you are by default, a douchebag.

This rule has come to pass through extensive in-the-field testing. Please note that this is not a knock against persons with this technology. I know many people who are extremely responsible in their headset use, putting it on as needed.

Of the people who DO keep them on, there seem to be a few consistent traits:
1.) If / When they do finally get a call, they speak too loudly and without and consideration for those around them

2.) Constantly fiddle with their phones, earpiece, or crotches (in an obvious display of overcompensation)

3.) Usually wear poorly fitting suits

Axiom 4 - PEOPLE, STUPID PEOPLE
The root of this axiom reflects the ideal that, "People are generally stupid, but people are generally good."

This rule comes out of my own personal experiences, hard historical evidence, and a flair for paradox. When I look back on choices that I have made, it is fair to say that not only have a I made stupid choices, but I have made them on a semi-consistent basis. The flip side of this is that despite these consistently poor choices, in most cases they were made with the only the best intentions.


Now, of course their are more than (4) axioms, but I don't want to overwhelm you. I hope you have found the listed axioms helpful. Basically, I think the thing we can all take away from this is, Tony Robbins ain't got shit on me. Have an enlightened day.

POLITICAL UPDATE:
DON'T FORGET TO VOTE [DEMOCRATIC] ON TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 2006!










HALLOWEEN COSTUME UPDATE:
Text Vote Tally:
WINNER - L. Ron Hubbard (7 Votes)
Star Jones Skin Suit (3 Votes)
Mexican / US Border Fence (2 Votes)

Thanks to all who participated!

1 comment:

Jean said...

Hey, found this in Grandma's inbox and just bookmarked your blog. Keep up the insanity.

Jean

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